From my previous post…

Do not compare yourself to others.
Thomas Jefferson once said, “Comparison is the thief of Joy.” If we compare ourselves to the models in the magazines, especially those who have been drastically altered, we are doing ourselves a huge injustice.

Comparisons are something I hear quite frequently in every area of my life. I am an athlete, so at every event or workout everyone constantly focuses on being faster than someone else. I am also a therapist, so at work I often hear clients who are concerned with how much better someone in their life is at this, that or the other thing. I am a woman who has many friends who are constantly striving to achieve a body that they love, rather than the one they currently have. What few people tend to focus on though, is that each individual is special in his or her own way. No one has walked your exact path, so why would you expect to end up in the same place as another person?

Comparison is a dangerous thing. I say this because it can only lead to two things… arrogance or shame. What it will NOT lead you to is happiness. Think about that for a minute…

Arrogance makes us feel as though we are ahead of the person that we are using for our comparison. At this point you are “winning” and you may start to feel like you are better than the other person. Having some pride in your work is great and can be a motivating factor to better yourself; however, when that pride stems from comparison, it generally only creates arrogance.

Shame is the other end of the spectrum, and this is what I see a lot more of in my everyday life. Shame is that little devil on your shoulder that is constantly telling you that you’re behind or not good enough. You may start to feel as though someone else has an unfair advantage and the odds are wrongfully stacked against you. When this begins to be the primary thought in our head, we tend to give up because oftentimes that is the easier option.

Neither thing leads you one step closer to your goal.

The only person you should truly be comparing yourself to is the person you were yesterday. We get a new chance to be amazing every day, so why waste your time trying to focus on other people’s accomplishments? Find your own passion, and work towards your own goals. You will likely find much more happiness in your life when you learn to let go of those constant comparisons.

Working with a counselor can help you discover your true potential. Each one of us has our own individualized path through life, and working with a trained therapist can help you figure out what yours should look like. Perhaps comparison is something that you find you do too often. If you would like to speak to a trained therapist who may help you to refocus on finding your own set of goals, please contact Life Enhancement Counseling Services in Orlando at 407-443-8862 and schedule your appointment today.