Invisible is My Superpower–The Practical Side

Clean clothes, clean sheets and food in the refrigerator are all things that just magically happened for me growing up. Even though we were not affluent, all of my basic needs were met and I never thought twice about opening a drawer and finding clean clothes or wondering if we would make it to the doctor when I was sick.

Now that I have children of my own, I often joke to them that a fairy does the laundry and fills the refrigerator. By fairy, I mean that in their world an invisible being does most of the mundane, household chores. A fairy or invisible being because they seem to never notice who does these tasks. And they certainly do not verbally thank the person doing them…which by the way is me!

When I think about everything it takes to “run a house” as my mother used to say, the first things that come to mind are:  scheduling all medical and dental appointments, transporting to said appointments, budgeting, paying bills, cleaning, deep cleaning, doing laundry, clothes shopping, grocery shopping, food prep and cooking, car cleaning/maintenance, gift buying, party and holiday planning, caring for animals and their vet/grooming appointments, and stopping at the post office. This is by no means a comprehensive list of what it takes to keep a home humming and yet, I feel tired just typing it, especially when we consider that most people who perform these tasks also have full time jobs.

This list does not include the minutes of each day spent talking to our children, encouraging them and helping them with homework. Nor does it include the time we carve out for our partners—a date night in or out, or morning coffee. I also have not even mentioned the time it takes to shuttle children to all of their extra-curricular activities, as well as time that is allotted for exercising, engaging in spiritual/religious activities, etc.

When my children were very young and I seemed to be in an endless cycle of cleaning, nurturing, caretaking and doctor appointments, I would often say with a smile, “My life is not glamorous.” The smile was there because there was nothing I would rather be doing. However, I recognized then as I do now that so much of parenting (or just doing these tasks for your partner if you do not have kids) is an invisible, thankless and unglamorous job.

I will speak more to this topic in the personal blog on invisible work. For now, think about who does most of the invisible work in your home. Is it you? Or someone else? How do you feel about your current role in your home environment? As the new year begins, this is an excellent time to evaluate how you are doing in your various life roles and what you would like to change. If you need to make a change, please contact us today at 407-443-8862 to schedule an appointment with one of our experienced mental health counselors. Life Enhancement Counseling Services has everything you need to help be the best you in 2023.


Yolanda Brailey