Feeling “Under the Weather”—The Personal Side

I attended a funeral out of town and drove 11 hours to get there, while it rained the.entire.time. It rained that night as well, and then proceeded to rain the entire next day. As I trekked from my hotel to the church, to a friend’s house and back to the hotel again, the rain never let up. The weather mirrored the mood that day. A slow drizzle falling from endless gray like the tears of all those present…a monochrome backdrop to the day’s solemn events. 

I have been to many funerals, but this was my first one in about five years. Driving home I kept thinking about the person who passed (way too young I might add) and I have continued thinking about him and how quickly life passes over the past few weeks.

If there is any beauty in tragedy, any light in death (for me), it is this. Death always reminds me what is important in my life and gently holds me accountable to keep celebrating it.  Grief unveils in my heart the things I want to invest in on this earth and cast shadows on those that take up more space in my life than I truly want. 

Depression is like that too sometimes, or at least it can be. I believe that if we realize what is wrong, it can inspire us to uncover what is right. When we are sad, disappointed or dissatisfied, we find ourselves in the unique position to begin searching for what we truly need and want.  Sometimes it is easiest to see the light when we are in the dark. But only if we are brave enough to search for it and ask for help.  (Note: sometimes we are so depressed we have to ask for help before we can begin searching). 

As I made the long drive home from the funeral, I began to think about what truly matters in my life. I made mental notes about both short and long term goals I want to work towards in order to honor the people, efforts and work in my life I deem most valuable. In an unexpected way, attending that funeral encouraged me to examine where I am and where I am going.

How about you? Are you experiencing seasonal depression? Are you feeling trapped at the “bottom” of a major depressive episode? Or maybe your life just needs a “tune up.” Maybe now is the time to sit down with a counselor and consider your life path, including both your short and long term goals. Whatever unique personal challenges you are facing, an experienced mental health counselor can help you. Please contact Life Enhancement Counseling Services in Orlando today at 407-443-8862 to make an appointment.


Yolanda Brailey