Pessimist, optimist, realist. These are labels people use to describe themselves. I think, for me, at some point I have been each of these. I also think that realist is sometimes just a slightly lighter word than pessimist.

How would you describe yourself? How would you like to describe yourself and what do you think it would take to get there? I would like to think that very few people would want to describe themselves as pessimists. If you are pessimist, it is important to ask yourself how and why you think you became one. This is best done with therapeutic support in an environment where you feel safe, heard and supported. 

For me, moving from becoming a pessimist to an optimist has been a process. I guess I would say I am a recovered pessimist. I still struggle at times, but most days I choose to speak life—in my mind and also with my mouth. I have found (and cognitive-behavioral therapy supports) that what we think about and say affects how we feel and what we do. Our thoughts, feelings and behaviors are connected. 

The motivation to speak life and be kind is really twofold for me. When I choose to use kind and positive words, I feel better. And, when I offer these words to others, the hope is that they feel better too. Also, I do not want to ever say anything that would damage others as I have seen the fallout of such in my office many times—people that are wounded years later by what an important person in their life said to them.

My guess is that if you are struggling to be kind to others you also may be having a hard time being kind to yourself. You deserve the time and space to explore your wants and needs and implement a plan that will create the life you want. If you would like to speak with one of our experienced mental health counselors about changing the way you think, feel and speak to create a more positive life, please contact us today at 407-443-8862 to schedule an appointment.