Loneliness is defined as a subjective, unpleasant feeling of isolation or lack of connection with others. Solitude is the quality or state of being alone or far-off from society: seclusion; an uninhabited place. Solitude is different from loneliness, in that when we speak of loneliness it has this negative undertone, like loneliness is not chosen. But, solitude has a neutral to positive tone, like to choose solitude or seclusion or to choose to be alone versus loneliness often implies that lack of choice. We all need solitude but we do not all NEED loneliness; there’s a difference. Solitude can be a great way to stimulate creativity!  Robert Coplan is a psychologist who studies the cost and benefits of solitude across the lifespan. Coplan cites the shower effect in an example of this, “If you do your best thinking in the shower, you are not alone”. The most common locations where people have sudden insights (“aha!” moments) include in the shower, during transport, and while exercising. Though these activities are not always solitary; these activities typically offer a break from our usual constant stream of information we have when engaging with others, especially socially. In solitude our mind has the space to wander, to think freely. Free thinking stimulates different parts of our brains than what we do normally. This gives backing to the suggestion of taking a break and then coming back to something later when you’re stuck. Give yourself some free-thinking space to let your mind wander and reset. Productivity is not always king, sometimes that rest, even mental rest is what is needed. 

In the practical blog on this piece, we began unpacking the pros and cons of AI in the world of counseling. Here, I would like to continue that conversation. If you have not read the practical part of this blog on this topic, I encourage you to go back and do so. There are definite safety concerns when it comes to using AI in counseling and some of these are covered in that part of the blog.

Rainbow sidewalks might seem arbitrary; it is just a chunk of concrete. It doesn’t do anything for the LGBTQ+ community in Florida. But, why do rainbow crosswalks matter? If you are curious keep reading.

*Content Warning:  This blog post contains a discussion of suicide.  Please take care while reading. If you are in crisis or need support, please dial 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.  It is hard to believe that what we know as AI actually began in 1950. And, the first chatbot was created in 1964 at MIT. The MIT chatbot was named Eliza and was able to hold a conversation with humans.

Frederic Gros is a french philosopher who edited Michel Focault’s paper’s (another french philosopher, political activist, and historian); wrote the Philosophy of Walking in 2014 which is a great book on mindfulness, being present, and (of course) walking. A Philosophy of Shame was published in May of this year. He poses a different narrative to shame than the one I feel we currently cling to in psychology.

Looking back over my life, the list of what I have waited for is somewhat daunting. In my adult life alone, I have waited for: high school to finish, college to start, college to finish, grad school to start, grad school to finish, dating to begin, engagement to take place, marriage, children and home buying (more than once). I have also waited on my business to start and my business to grow. In relationships, I have waited for friendships to be conceived, for relationships to grow and for reconciliation when things went sideways. In my family, I have waited for loved ones to get better and for my sorrow to heal when they did not. I can personally say that I have spent much of my life waiting. And even today, there are big and small things in my life I am waiting for and I am guessing the same is probably true for you.